I'm getting a landline

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Yup! You heard me right. I’m getting a landline home phone and no, it’s not due to a lack of cell phone service at our house. I’m getting a landline in an effort to be more present with my kids. I’ll be putting my cell phone down in the evenings until Lucy goes down at 8:30. As it is, I make a conscious effort to be present and focus on them, but there are instances where I check my phone or post a pic on Instagram and the reality is, all of those things can wait until after they go to bed.

This may seem like it’s coming out of left field, but I’m newly a parent of two. Being that I’m not pregnant anymore (thank GOODNESS!) and I’m starting to feel more like myself again (if myself was part dairy cow…mooooo), I’m starting to assess our daily routines. We, as parents, are creating our kids memories and what they will grow up to remember as their version of normal. I want to make sure that I’m mindful of that responsibility. I want them to see me being active, engaged, reading, playing, laughing, etc. I don’t want them to see us plugged into our phones and not plugging into our family.

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This can be really hard, especially when your jobs become more and more demanding with expectations that we are available 24/7. My plan is to give my close family, friends, and boss my landline number, so if there is an emergency or something time sensitive, I can be reached. Otherwise, I’ll be responding to texts, emails and DM’s after 8:30pm. The boundaries are clear and, as Rachel Hollis, author of Girl, Wash Your Face says, “It’s not about being perfect, it’s about being better today that I was yesterday.”

Being a first time parent changes more than the obvious

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I'm just talking about for me, but when Jerud and I talked about having a baby, we talked about all the logical stuff: child care, insurance, diapers, car seat, etc.  Then, when we got pregnant, we talked about the first time parent stuff...nursing, bottle feeding, bath time.  You get the drill.  What we didn't talk about was how it was going to change our relationship and our dynamic.  For me, as soon as I held Lucy, my life changed.  I was no longer the top of my priority list, she was.  My relationship with Jerud wasn't even the top of my list, she was.  It was like in that split second, everything I used to care about became obsolete.  

It's been a real struggle for Jerud and my relationship.  I don't consider myself naive.  I knew I wouldn't get sleep and I knew that my life was going to change, but I didn't realize how much it would change. Do I want to go on a date?  Not really.  I'm away form her all day while I'm at work and the last thing on my mind is getting a babysitter to go out to dinner.  When I go home, I just want to hang out with her, and play tea party.  Before you gasp and say that I'm being selfish.  Keep in mind that yes, we DO things that don't involve her.  I do some travel for work and we have events that we go to that aren't "kid friendly."

My recommendation?  Talk, talk, talk.  Lame? Maybe, but at least you'll know you're on the same page and be better prepared for all the fantastic, exciting, moments that are about to come your way. 

Just know, it's all worth it.